Customers shopped. Discussioners stopped. A rich man stepped to the clerk, busting her chops.
He said, "I make more green than algae. Loop-de-loops with ice cream scoops now are just nostalgia. I got coops of well-fed pheasants. I made my web presence on the backs of dead peasants. I got all types of cash and I'll talk trash like a hyperspazz 'til my mouth catches diaper rash." Then he left.
She thought, "Can a man remain posh without being brainwashed? Is it really all web sites, tennis whites, and playing squash? What a jerk, was he trying to flirt?"
As the clerk got back to work, another guy went berserk.
A crazy guy with a paisley tie and one glass and one lazy eye
came in. His brain was spongy grade D lunch meat
held together with a scrunchy.
He said, "If y'all are so destitute, how come you're dressed so cute? Sometimes it's best to toot my own horn about my idiosyncrasies. I video pink pussies. I shoot my own porn. It's wrong to rape a slut. It's wrong to penetrate the paper-cut where an origami truck scraped her butt. I'm pacing and passionate because my cupcake had hash in it. Look, a dopey fairy is chasing a doggy topiary. I'm'a help her with catching it!" He left.
The clerk, she just rolled her eyes. You could say he told her lies
but she'll let any old tramp in. Nothing sold is no surprise
and they're lamping at the Anarchist Bookstore.
As the clerk worked on a blurb about herb, another berserker jumped in off the curb, wearing a metal mask.
"May I help you?" she, unsettled, asked.
He said, "Outside there's an army of Metal faces and in several cases they're ready to dead all shtetl places. This is it. Adults'll need protection."
She said, "Yeah, but what changes when you're done? Nothing. Like the results of an election."
He said, "Oh so I should just call it off? Go back to the house, douse the Molotov?"
She said, "You want to set our city in flames because you're full of pity and blame. You just want the freedom to sit at home and play videogames. Maybe we could drain some ingrained aggression if you came for a training session."
He said, "I don't want to volunteer. I'm calling y'all in here to splash some sack and smash the Mac and get outside. It's action-packed. I don't know if you are but all of you look poor. Now let's leave the Anarchist Bookstore."